Re-Do on the Breast Reconstruction - Yes Again!

I know this sounds redundant, redundant, but yes, this is the 5th surgery for me for this last round of cancer and my third breast reconstruction. And like the professional patient that I have apparently become these past 20 years, I have my pre-surgery juju and rituals down to a science now - juicing, keeping to myself, yoga, a massage, inspirational reading and a mishmash of surgical customs. Makes me feel like I have an ounce more control over something that I truly have zero control over.

As for the video, it will give you an inside peek into the ups, downs and the twisted (as in my case) of what can happen to an implant, post-mastectomy as well as my journey in Cancerland. And as usual, my amazing plastic surgeon, Dr. Julio Soares rocked yet this surgery too! Repositioned implant - check. Encapsulated scar tissue removed - check. Reshaped capsule pocket - check. Breast liposuction - check. A rockstar surgeon - check.

Sometimes, I must admit that these ongoing surgeries, no matter how big, serious or small they may be, still get to me. And because I'm a bit of a pro now, my mind often looks beyond the surgery as I know what lies ahead of me - pain, drains, meds and sponge baths. And of course as most all cancer survivors will tell you, I can't seem to disregard my nervousness about the possibility of my surgeon 'finding something.' (But he didn't - WOOT!).

Lastly, you might inquire as to why I made a video of this most recent journey - it was because it allows me to examine a small but significant segment of my life and what I have conquered. The silver lining in doing this is that it sheds light on my present and all that I have to be grateful for.

Surgery went well, I didn't have drains, my implant only twisted around and the surgery lasted only over an hour instead of the predicted 2-3 hours. My incredible surgeon did his brilliant work once again and this recent journey was by far, the easiest surgery and recovery - see for yourself.

Jill's Wish is My Wish

Logo Courtesy of Jill's Wish

Before Jill's Wish, I learned of this remarkable warrior via Twitter as I was laying in bed recouping from another chemo treatment.  I came across her video that to this day, has had such a lasting impression on me. I was immediately awe-struck, not just because of Jill's beauty, grace and elegance, but because of the tenacity, persistence and fortitude of this metastatic warrior. So then it began, the journey of following her journey, which, is why I simply had to feature her non-profit Jill's Wish for this month's Pinktober.

And in case you missed her raw and candid beauty in the 15 min documentary,  The Light That Shines by Sue Bryce, acclaimed fashion portrait photographer and videographer, you must take the time to watch it now. Because trust me, you will be impacted in the same way that so many thousands have been by her message and her essence. 

Even more impressive has been Jill's pay-it-forward and give-back mission to spread her message of strength, love and joy in the midst of her own personal health challenges. Between hospital visits and treatment, she has appeared on several T.V. spots, morning shows and at conferences saying that if she could help "just one person" then she could "die a happy person." 

Wow. What?!

Of course there is more, which is again why I wanted to feature her on my website and blog. And like me, she has endured the financial strain of cancer which is why one of her biggest messages and fundraising efforts is to help others in need. Bingo, she hooked me yet again!

Fast forward to a few days ago when I read on her facebook page that the 'beast' (as we both call it) is coming at her in full force, leaving her with few treatment options. My heart simply sank. But knowing Jill, she is still forging forward with both grace and courage as she attends to her current health challenge. With her wonderful mom and amazing husband, Bart by her side, my guess is that she is still giggling her way through yet another serious phase of her life.

So, with that, please take some time to learn more about this amazing warrior and then immediately donate any amount that you can to her cause that is so close to her heart and of course mine.

#GiveItUp4Mets

Click the picture to donate!

That's right, you heard me, I'm here to tell you to #GiveItUp4Mets! Why? Because this is the real killer of breast cancer which gets little funding out of this month's uber-Pinktober. And in case you didn't know, let me remind you of some formidable stats and of the Elephant in the Pink Room...

Picture courtesy of METavivor

Stage IV, Metastatic Breast Cancer (the transference of malignant or cancerous cells to other parts of the body by way of the blood or lymphatic vessels or membranous surfaces) is how men and women die from this disease. And unfortunately, nothing has changed much for this group of people as still, 30% of those originally diagnosed with Stage 0, 1, 2 and 3 will progress to Stage 4. Another alarming stat is that after someone is diagnosed with Stage IV breast cancer, life expectancy for this group is 18 months to 2 years which translates to my sisters and brothers out there dying of this disease every 14 minutes. And if you knew someone that died from breast cancer, this is why and how they did. 

Is it starting to make sense now? Difficult to swallow I know, but this is information that we all need to have tucked away in our minds and hearts to truly comprehend this disease.

So, please, I am strongly encouraging you to consider something simple that you can give up in honor or in memory of those affected by Stage IV, Metastatic Breast Cancer. Here's how... take the money that you would have used for a coffee, a mani/pedi, a lunch out, a pizza, a car wash or a movie and take those greenbacks and donate them to METavivor, one of the few organizations out there funding research for this stage of BC!

THEN, and hear comes the cool part... Take a selfie picture or selfie video of how you will #GiveItUp4Mets and the amount that you donated to METavivor. Send us your creative and awesome selfie over at Cancer, Cancer bo-Bancer's new website. Be sure to tell us who you gave it up for (in honor or memory of someone or for a future someone) and we'll put it on our website. Here's mine! - I gave up a pedicure (yep, doing my own!) and gave those dollars to METavivor. So, keep the selfies coming our way, keep donating and by all means, keep caring about someone with or about to hear the news that they have Stage 4, Metastatic Breast Cancer.

I also encourage you to watch this short video from METavivor about Stage IV, Metastatic Breast cancer. It will change the way you think about breast cancer - I guarantee it! Then, take just 5 minutes and one click to make a donation of any monetary value to METavivor. 

Every. Single. Dollar. Counts!

Pinkwashing: The Truth Behind the Sale

I think Elizabeth Taylor may have summed it up best when she said: "I fell off my pink cloud with a thud." And to that I say, "Well said Liz" because that's exactly how I feel.

Now don't get me wrong, I do have adoration for the color pink, own several pink shirts and blouses that are hanging in my closet and really do think that the singer Pink is quite talented. But when it comes to breast cancer awareness month and all the pseudo fundraising and Races for the Cure going on out there, I find myself getting more anti-pink. It even makes me think of what my sister used to say when we were younger - 'Pink, Pink You Stink!" And to her I say, "Right on, sister!"

So, first let me help you understand the pink underbelly of this famous and mass-marketed month of Pinkwashing.

Pinkwashing [verb] 1. The act of using breast cancer to guilt consumers into buying a product which, if it had not been for the advent of aiding the cure for cancer, they would not have bought. 2. the use of breast cancer by corporate marketers in which companies promote their products with claims to donate a percentage of proceeds to the cause

My definition? 1. An out-of-control lack of cause marketing where funding typically goes to more mass marketing and less funding goes to actual research to find a cure.

There. I said it.

So, now let me illustrate a couple of experiences and stories that will assist you in not only understanding Pinkwashing, but help you make some informed decisions to keep you abreast (pun intended) the next time you're standing in front of a pink endcap.

Today, I was walking in our quaint, beachside downtown area when I saw the sign above. Curious of course, I walked past the shiny and beautiful display of pink items for purchase and inquired about the 'Breast Cancer Research' donation statement. Three sales clerks in this high end boutique paused with great silence when I asked where the funds earned from their Brighton sponsored items would be bankrolled? Silence. Crickets.

Finally, all three of the ladies stumbled with responses such as "Uh, I don't know but let me see if I could find out" and "To breast cancer research" when suddenly, one of the clerks quickly departed the area while the other one just looked down. Finally, my inner Sagittarius couldn't take it any longer and I said rather firmly, "You should really know where those funds go if your store is selling them." Met with silence yet again, I launched into my Pinkwashing definition and my "I'm a 3 time breast cancer survivor" spiel before spinning around and leaving the store while the remaining sales clerk reached her hand out to pat my arm to say "I'm soooo glad that you're still here." Ok, I gave her an A for effort.

Not stopping at this experience, I came home later today and did what any cancer advocate would do - I Tweeted Brighton, inquiring about their #PowerofPink campaign and asked them where they donate those funds to from the accessory purchases. Still no answers and 6 tweets later, I got a cute little red heart icon and a "We'll follow up with that store. Thanks for letting us know." So, of course I responded and included the 'Pinkwashing' hashtag (hey, they included their #PowerofPink hashtag in an earlier tweet. What's fair is fair!).

One last story, my breastie, Ann Marie Otis over at Stupid Dumb Breast Cancer told me that she had a friend back in New York that saw a pink display and inquired as I did without any answer. Still bothered by the lack of information, she called back to the store to inquire yet again, when she was told that the funds were being donated to 'Various Breast Cancer Organizations' and in particular, St. Judes - 'A world leader in finding cures and saving children with cancer and other life-threatening diseases.' A credible organization and cause for sure but hardly related to breast cancer.

So, with that, I'll leave you with a couple of suggestions for the next time you find yourself in front of a pink blender, a pink fracking drill bit, a ride for a cure dealership or a pink endcap in your local grocery store. First, inquire about the donation and funding resource and their cause marketing. Second, see what those funds are actually used for. And third, consider scientific research or patient funding as a place to put your money. Or, visit Cancer, Cancer bo-Bancer and choose one of our 4 breast cancer organizations that we're featuring for this month.

Now get the 'frack' out there and help us find a cure.

Cancer Cancer bo-Bancer is LIVE and just in time for Pinktober!

www.cancercancerbobancer.com

After weeks of planning, thinking and more thinking, I've finally resolved myself to the fact that I needed to move Cancer, Cancer bo-Bancer (CCBB) to the next level - a website with a cause. Why? Because I want to do something about this disease in terms of research, finding a cure and supporting others out there doing amazing work.

Click on over and take a peek at what we have for this year's Breast Cancer Awareness month and as you'll see once you're there, the big push for me and my CCBB Tribe is our #GiveItUp4Mets campaign to assist in finding a cure through fundraising for Stage 4, Metastatic breast cancer with our co-advocates and research organization METavivor. This is the root of where we need funding in order for research to be successful and most importantly, get closer to a cure or at least a viable treatment protocol for Stage 4/metastatic BC. 

I'm also featuring one of my best breasties, Ann Marie Otis from Stupid Dumb Breast Cancer and her Bravery Bags cause so be sure to check that out. Additionally, donate and learn more about Pink & Blue the movie and Jill's Wish to financially support patients - two other causes that I'm backing for the entire month of October. Just know that literally, every dollar you can donate, counts and collectively adds up to great outcomes for both research and support services.

We're also uber excited about the organizations that we've chosen for the month-long campaign but know for sure, there will always be a cause for you to put your money and time behind! And, if you want your organization to be featured on the website, please contact us and tell us about your cause.

Lastly, I can't thank my CCBB Tribe enough for their dedication, love and support of this project and of me. I couldn't think of a better village to surround myself with and I count myself beyond lucky to have each of them in my life. 

So, with that, go take a peek and tell us what you think? What you'd like to see on the website? And what your favorite inspirational word is on our Warrior Jewelry page.

Now let's go find a cure!

Pinktober or Bust!

Excuse the pun. OK, forget the pun. Let's move on to the real purpose of this post which is Breast Cancer Awareness month that is literally peeking at us from around the corner.

With each year as Pinktober comes and goes, I find myself full of assorted sentiment about the month that continues to show up with more shades and hues of pink than I ever knew existed. Then the gamut of my emotions start to erupt and range from irritation surrounding the pink culture, guilt for the other cancers and diseases out there that need equal attention, gratitude that it's on the forefront of so many minds yet anger towards the lack of funding to find a cure for this disease and especially Stage 4/Metastatic BC that continues to steal lives from us on a regular basis.

So, with this entire spectrum of emotion surrounding Pinktober, I have been in serious contemplation about what I can do. One person, one blog, one survivor and one warrior who has made it through 3 rounds of this disease in the past 20 years. It must mean something right? What I need to do with all of this is the question that continues to occupy space in my brain and heart.

With nowhere to turn, I did what any survivor in my world could do, I reached out to one of my feisty breasties, Stupid Dumb Breast Cancer's Ann Marie Otis and proposed a plan, outlined it, and came up with a full month's Pinktober agenda. And by agenda, I mean a serious yet simple strategy to move closer to a cure. And of course she said a thunderous YES! In fact, her first line to me was "I think I love you!" Well, ditto to her and the blueprint we came up with for Pinktober 2014.

But just to bring more light to the overall picture here, we breasties and families out here are well 'aware' of breast cancer so may we please move on? Let's move past the pink purchases and take it to the next level shall we?

And by the way, not a day goes by where we are not reminded by this disease. You may see that we are out of treatment or have our hair back, but the scars are still there: some on the surface and some you simply can't see, they run too deep. We are often going back in for redos on our reconstruction, we continue to contend with daily fatigue, joint pain, the one nipple look, half a nipple, no nipples, tattood nipples (yes, I am saying the word nipples repeatedly and for a reason!) and weight gain due to meds. So please be self-assured that 'awareness' is ALWAYS on the forefront of our minds.

So, this is why we're done with the whole awareness gig and are ready to bump it up a notch - finding a damn cure. So, put your efforts and money where it matters most my friends - into research and support. We've lost too many beautiful souls to this disease and several over the past few weeks and I for one, am starting to get get pretty exasperated over this fact. Don't get me wrong, I am VERY grateful to have kicked breast cancer to the curb 3 times in 20 years BUT, we need to move past not wearing our bras for a month to increase awareness but focusing our efforts on funding quality research and organizations out there who are working with limited bankroll in order to find us a cure. Done. End of lecture.

Oh, one more thing, please stay tuned and hang tight until October 1st. We'll tell what to do, how to do it and where to donate your hard earned cash. It'll be that easy.

In the meantime, I leave you with this funny yet real quote that continues to be my most popular blog post to date - "Yes, their fake, the real ones tried to kill me!"

Enough said. Here we go.

Dear Breast Cancer Age Discrimination, You Still Exist?

Here it is my lovely friends, breasties and survivors; an update and my first (and potentially only) response that I received about my age discrimination inquiry with the organization Bright Pink. I had previously decided not to mention their name on my most recent blog post, but I've since changed my mind. I now find it imperative to state their name as I would not want others to walk down the same path as I have in trying to demystify this breast cancer age discrimination matter. So, read our exchange of e-mails and as always, be sure to comment with your thoughts or list those organizations and people that you have found helpful on this journey. Their correspondence is in Bright Pink! Mine, is well, not so Bright Pink.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________

Hi Dee Anne, 

Thank you for your note and I apologize that you had not previously received a response to your inquiries. I am happy to explain why we are focused on preventive breast and ovarian health for young women specifically. Bright Pink was created to fulfill a void in the women's health space. While there are organizations out there that focus on survivorship, there was not a resource for young women who had not been diagnosed. These women have the power to be proactive with their breast and ovarian health. That's where Bright Pink comes in. We focus specifically on prevention and early detection of breast and and ovarian cancer in young women and provide support for women at high-risk for these diseases. In order to be successful in our work, we have chosen to maintain this specific focus. We are not so naive as to think we are good at everything so when someone reaches out that could better benefit from a partner organization, we work hard to direct that woman to the best resources available for her specific needs. This allows us to stay focused in our area of expertise - education and support for young women - and allows other groups to continue to succeed in their specific areas.

Our support programs offer guidance, community and camaraderie for young women who have not been diagnosed but who are at high-risk for breast or ovarian cancer due to a strong family history and genetic predisposition. As a 3-time survivor, your journey has varied greatly from these women, and you should receive specific support tailored to your unique experience. We would never turn anyone away from an educational perspective - all of the information published on BrightPink.org is open to anyone and everyone who can access it - but when it comes to support, you deserve an organization that can best serve you as a survivor. 

Many qualified partners who specialize in survivorship support are listed on our website here -http://www.brightpink.org/ive-been-diagnosed/. 

Thank you for reaching out, and please let me know if we can help in facilitating an introduction to another organization equipped to support you as a survivor. 

Best wishes,
Eden

_________________________________________________________________________________________________

Hello Eden,

Thank you for your return response and email regarding my inquiry about your age limits with Bright Pink. It is much appreciated as my last email did not receive a response.

With regard to the main focus and message of Bright Pink, I am in complete agreement that there is a need and a void that has been filled with the Bright Pink organization. And as a 25 year veteran educator, I understand the need for education, prevention, awareness and self-advocacy. Your message is clear in that sense and Ms. Avner's brave decision to have a preventive mastectomy was indeed both an intelligent and courageous choice.

My confusion, however is with the mix of both prevention and survivorship with regard to all ages of individuals. And while I agree that prevention is key for saving lives, the age cutoff, in my opinion, is extremely exclusionary. If the notion is to save lives with this disease, then age is a factor that doesn't belong in the mix. I equate that to having a breast cancer-based organization only for specific ethnic backgrounds - a puzzling notion at best. And as we all know, this disease crosses all gender, ethnic and age boundaries. I shutter to think about a 46 year old woman seeking support for prevention should she identify as high risk. Would you turn her away as you did me? 

Additionally, I am further confused about your message that specifically focuses on prevention and yet you feature breast cancer survivors and Fab-U-Wish Winners who have also been diagnosed on your website. So, in light of this, it does appear that survivors are welcomed to Bright Pink - well, as long as they're between the ages of 18 and 45. 

And with regard to Bright Pink teaming up with the Kentucky Derby SURVIVORS Parade this year, I find it odd and ironic that although your 'specific focus' is with 'YOUNG women' - Bright Pink is accepting funds and donations on behalf of the 140 survivors participating in the parade to which many are clearly over your age bracket of 45. Why would you welcome funding for ALL ages when your specific focus is on YOUNG women. Such a mixed message and disconnect in my opinion, wouldn't you agree? But, in case you're unclear, here is verbatim, what is documented on the Kentucky Derby website:

Kentucky Oaks 140 Survivors Parade

Thank you for nominating and sharing your survivor’s story, voting for your favorite and most inspirational story, and for donating to Bright Pink on behalf of your favorite nominee. Your participation and your donations will help to educate, support and empower young women nationwide in prevention of breast and ovarian cancer. You can still donate to Bright Pink, now!

So my hope, is that in the future, Ms. Avner will consider opening up prevention, awareness, camaraderie and advocacy for ALL ages of individuals that is inclusive of both genders. I would like to think that the main goal should purely focus on saving lives.

In terms of my own journey as a 3-time survivor, it has been a unique experience and there are no organizations to date that focus on that, which I am fine with. I am a medical anomaly to not only the breast cancer community but to several teams of doctors. I already don't fit into a group so I continue to reach out to groups that reciprocate support in spite of my uncommon path. And as you so politely stated, I do deserve an organization that can best serve my needs and clearly I am not welcomed at Bright Pink. And thanks for your willingness to help facilitate introducing me to another organization "equipped to support me as a survivor" - but I believe I can handle this independently as this ain't my first breast cancer rodeo!

It is also transparent that Bright Pink is simply not an organization for this 'hereditary, 3-time, breast cancer survivor.' I had hoped that I could reach out to Bright Pink personally as well as, stand behind this organization on behalf of others in need, but it is clear that it is simply not a fit for me or many others. So, best wishes to you all with your specific focus, but this gal is moving on.

Lastly, if you'd like to find out more about my 'unique journey,' other organizations, films and individuals, I would welcome you to visit my blog at http://cancercancerbo-bancer.blogspot.com/. Here, you will also find my own campaign and education for my 'breasties' of ALL ages on my blog for their reference so they can make the best decision for which types of organizations best fits their needs. Oh, and you'll also find our correspondence on there as well, because as we all know and as Bright Pink states, 'Knowledge is Power!'

 

Dee Anne Barker, M.A.

Nothing But Blue Skies

Is There Breast Cancer Age Discrimination?

Recently, I came across an organization that is doing some great work with regard to supporting patients and warriors, disseminating valuable information and even has a celeb tied to the organization as their spokesperson. 'On a mission to reach millions of women between the ages of 18-45...'  Well darn-it-all, I'm 50-freaking-3! But wait, I WAS 31 and then 36 for my first two breast cancer diagnosis, does that count?

Immediately, I must confess that I felt discriminated against and slightly disturbed by their age cut-off. I mean, even most job applications don't discriminate against gender, age, sexual orientation, ethnicity and the like. Why this? Why now? Why with breast cancer?

So, I did what any advocating, 3-time, breast cancer warrior should do....I wrote them, inquiring about this head-scratching cancer paradox. Furthermore, I saw that they were teaming up with the Kentucky Derby's Survivor's Parade this year to which one of my fave breasties, Jill Brzezinski-Conley is a nominee to walk in (please vote for her - she deserves it!), so I thought I would investigate the age issue a tad further. Now Jill falls well within their specified age range, but I did happen to notice that a few of the other nominees clearly fall out of the top of their age bracket of 45 which got me to thinking... will this organization not speak to or support these women as they partake in the parade? Will they be shunned because they happened to have been diagnosed past the ripe age of 45? Will they not receive the recognition that they so deserve? Will they not be given their parade gear because - ugh, cancer picked on them way too late in life? And even more importantly, what about my breasties that are beyond the 45 year age range that are terminal and in the fight of their life - will they not receive the respect that they've earned and should have?

Hmmmm.... maybe it's just me, but does any of this make sense to you?

So, now I'll see if this popular organization that I actually wrote 6 months ago inquiring about their wish-granting program, will AGAIN, ignore my inquiry and kick this 53-year old cancer warrior to the curb? Will I not receive, at the very least, a respectable response? I'll keep you posted.

In the meantime, let me switch gears and flip this annoyance around and refer you to some awesome, non-age-discrimination organizations and peeps who I know you will find supportive:

Stupid Dumb Breast Cancer
Talk About Health
Facing Cancer
Breast Cancer Social Media 
Healthline

Lastly, feel free to add an organization, group or any peeps that support ALL breast cancer survivors in the comments section. It's important for us to help each other during the experience of breast cancer and to band together, no matter what.

Nothing But Blue Skies

Inspired by one of my breasties, Wendy Nielsen and the title she gave my guest post this month, I thought I would sign off Pinktober with the color BLUE. Blue for my fave new song Nothing But Blue Skies, and for my fresh outlook on life. This beautiful color is also a tribute to the men out there trying to get some recognition and funding for breast cancer with films like Times Like These. And since I'm a bit further out now from round-freakin' 3 of the Big C., I thought I would sum up how I feel (at least for today) with Irving Berlin's song, Blue Skies. Little did this great, Russian-American composer know that 87 years after he wrote it, some random breast cancer survivor would adopt it as her new anthem in life. So, thanks Irv - much appreciated! And yes, there are Nothing But Blue Skies, Smiling at me! 

Blue Skies

by Irving Berlin

I was blue, just as blue as I could be 
Ev'ry day was a cloudy day for me 
Then good luck came a-knocking at my door 
Skies were gray but they're not gray anymore 

Blue skies 
Smiling at me 
Nothing but blue skies 
Do I see 

Bluebirds 
Singing a song 
Nothing but bluebirds 
All day long 

Never saw the sun shining so bright 
Never saw things going so right 
Noticing the days hurrying by 
When you're in love, my how they fly 

Blue days 
All of them gone 
Nothing but blue skies 
From now on 


I should care if the wind blows east or west 
I should fret if the worst looks like the best 
I should mind if they say it can't be true 
I should smile, that's exactly what I do

A Stupid Dumb Breast Cancer Knockdown!

One of my fave breast friends Ann Marie Giannino-Otis, over at Stupid Dumb Breast Cancer is going the distance once again by taking a jab at breast cancer on the cover of Syracuse Women Magazine. Her cover story of course, not only details her effervescent personality and warrior ways, but her philanthropic means of helping others through the world of cancer. She has a strong following and holds fun and purposeful events on a monthly basis for her non-profit Stupid Dumb Breast Cancer - SDBC (her son's name for breast cancer).

When I first came across Ann Marie on her Twitter page I almost "fell off my unicorn" (her words, not mine) reading all of her tweets. With kind words, hilarious sayings and her fundraising efforts, I was hooked!

Keeping it real, meaningful and sassy, Ann Marie will stop at nothing when it comes to advocating for herself and others. Insisting that people know the real side of the breast cancer journey, her posts on the SDBC Facebook page are guaranteed to be full of left hooks and power punches. I've seen her take on numerous people making light of this journey and she'll have no part of it. Sassy but heartfelt, she'll take on anyone that attempts to knock down any of her girls and followers.

So, follow her, like her (she's VERY likable!) and get to know the real side of breast cancer - pictures and all! And if you cross her, you can be sure that she'll challenge you to a round of You vs. Stupid Dumb Breast Cancer and Knock.You.Out!

Male Breast Cancer Documentary: 'Times Like These'

When I first came across these two guys, my heart just sank and immediately took me back to the early 90's to a time when a friend/colleague of mine (also named Bob) was diagnosed with breast cancer not too long after my first diagnosis. We were instantly bonded in that breast cancer way even though 'One-Boob-Bob' (his own nickname!) and I were different genders of the same cancer. We did cancer-survivor fashion shows together, fundraisers, and walks to raise awareness for the masses, but frankly, he was the only guy out there among a sea of women. And so, my first introduction to male breast cancer was born out of Bob's diagnosis.

Fast forward  20 years and a few weeks ago when I came across these two guys, Bill and Bob, on their Facebook page. I was captivated instantaneously and thought, FINALLY, someone is addressing the male side of breast cancer! The side that few are aware of or maybe even ignore. But it's for real, so here are a few stats that may surprise you but will aide in your knowledge of this female dominated cancer during the annual October Breast Cancer awareness campaign:

• There are 2000 new male breast cancer cases diagnosed every year
• 25% of men diagnosed with breast cancer will die
• Men of all ages can be affected with breast cancer

So, let's cut to the chase so you'll know how to help with Bill and Bob's campaign. First,  click here to watch the trailer of two extraordinary men who were complete strangers but were brought together through their breast cancer diagnosis. Secondly, please donate any dollar amount that you can on their Kickstarter campaign page so that they can finish this very important film 'Times Like These' and generate more awareness about male breast cancer. Lastly, know the signs and risks of male breast cancer for either yourself or loved ones.

There are only 23 more days to help fund this campaign! So, please help spread the word by forwarding this blog post, their Facebook page and their Kickstarter crowdfunding page! 

GO! DONATE! NOW!

Metastatic Breast Cancer Day

MBC doesn't get much attention, but it should! Just thought you should know that this is where we truly need funding and research dollars to go to! No pink overlays here, this sh*t's for real! Read below - you'll be stunned at the reality of MBC.

(This post is dedicated to Lisa Bonchek Adams, Jody Schoger, and the many others out there with MBC- so many - too many! Please also add your name, or another person's name in the comments section below to honor their integrity and crusade against MBC!)

1. No one dies from breast cancer that remains in the breast. Metastasis occurs
when cancerous cells travel to a vital organ and that is what threatens life.

2. Metastasis refers to the spread of cancer to different parts of the body: bones,
liver, lungs or brain.

3. An estimated 155,000 Americans are currently living with metastatic breast
cancer. Metastatic breast cancer accounts for approximately 40,000 deaths
annually in the U.S.

4. Treatment for metastatic breast cancer is life-long and focuses on control of
the disease and quality of life.

5. About 6% to 10% of people are Stage IV from their initial diagnosis.

6. Early detection does not guarantee a cure. Metastatic breast cancer can
occur 5, 10 or 15 years after a person's original diagnosis and successful
treatment checkups and annual mammograms.

7. 20% to 30% of people initially diagnosed with early stage disease will develop
metastatic breast cancer.

8. Young persons, as well as men, can be diagnosed with metastatic breast
cancer.

9. Like early stage breast cancer, there are different types of metastatic breast
cancer.

10. Treatment choices are guided by breast cancer type, location and extent of
metastasis in the body, previous treatments and other factors.

11. Metastatic breast cancer is not an automatic death sentence. Although most
people will ultimately die of the disease, some will live long, productive lives.

12. There are no definitive prognostic statistics for metastatic breast cancer.
Every patient and their disease are unique.

13. To learn more about National Metastatic Breast Cancer Awareness Day and
access resources specifically for people living with metastatic breast cancer
and their caregivers, visit www. mbcn.org

Cancer Center of Santa Barbara: Walk. Run. Donate.

If there's one way to give back this month, it should definitely be to your local cancer center!

I've been treated at 2 cancer centers over the past 20 years and with this last cancer diagnosis (I emphasize LAST!), I was beyond fortunate to have had amazing care from the Cancer Center of Santa Barbara. From the front desk gals, to the librarian, the 'Wig Guy,' the wonderful chemo nurses (AKA my 'Purple Angels'), my brilliant oncologist Dr. G., the snack lady, my hometown Physician's Assistant, to the financial assistant counselors and the uber kind, nurse navigator Tammy (AKA, my nurse 'GPS'), a cancer center can become a second home to a patient and their family. I know it was for me.

I actually looked forward to going into the CCSB (minus the chemo!) because of the remarkable amount of care that I received. Everyone knew my name and we were often greeted 50 feet away from the reception desk with "Oh no, here comes trouble!" I'm telling you, these people go beyond their job descriptions by showing selflessness, compassion and human kindness. A place where a patient like myself can feel 1000% support and emotionally safe. And oddly enough, one of the most positive places I could turn to during the past 2 years.

So, in light of my own PINKTOBER campaign this month, I highly recommend that you consider putting your pink dollars into your own cancer center community. A place where patients like myself can attend art classes, yoga, pick out free scarves and wigs and a place that assisted me in accessing nearly $35,000 in grant money to pay for all of my infusion treatments in 2013 when I personally ran out of funds.

So.... Give back. Give local. Give now. And while you're at it, consider contributing to my cancer center's  Walk - Run this weekend in Santa Barbara; a great cause indeed.

Bowling 4 BOOBIES!

That's right, you heard me say BOOBIES! And in keeping with this month's theme of introducing you to some great warriors, organizations and causes, this one is a must donate, must go event!

So listen, this fundraising event is happening this Sunday in L.A. and I was slated to be on the 'Boobie Bowlers' team but because of various life and medical events, our team is on hold until the next bowling event!

But hey, you can still go and show your support for this uber fun and meaningful event; an organization close to my heart that provides financial assistance to local women fighting and living with breast cancer. Because, as I've said before but will say it again, this breast cancer gig can be expensive. With bills like $65,000 for a hospital stay, $1,000 anesthesiology payments, $15,000 per chemo treatment every 3 weeks, a post-chemo-session Neulasta shot that was $3,000 for 6 treatments and $9,000 Herceptin treatments every 3 weeks for a year! It adds up. So, help a girl out by either donating online or by showing up for this awesome bowling event!

STRRRRIIIIIIIKE!

Pinktober!

As I marinate in the pro's and con's of Breast Cancer Awareness month and all of its pink glory, I internally struggle with how to make it more about people vs. spending some greenbacks on a pink cuisinart that has yet to find me a cure. And as my sister Kim and I often joke around with our 'Pink, Pink you Stink!' mantra, I have decided to shift my efforts this year from raising funds that have NOT found a cure for breast cancer to raising awareness about some pretty awesome warriors and causes. So, stay tuned during the month of PINKTOBER and I promise to deliver an ample amount of very groovy peeps, tributes and fabulous events that I know you can stand behind and appreciate. Because the bottom line is that I am beyond weary of this disease, people dying and no cure in sight! Instead, let's all simply give some well-deserved salutes where needed and cross our fingers that all of that pink paraphernalia might actually buy us what we truly need - a cure.